How did I get here?

A while back, I alluded to how my whole life suddenly changed when I got into the oil and gas industry.

Since it's the end of the year, which often puts us in a reflective mood, I thought I'd tell you the long convoluted story of how I ended up who and where I am today.

I've put the photos in this post as close as possible to the part of the story when they were taken.  I'll caption them so you have some idea of what you're looking at.

So...

Back many years ago, when I was... 21?  22 maybe? I had quit the supermarket job I started right out of school when I didn't get into any university courses.  I went from the supermarket to behind the bar of an Irish pub, and I was really hating it.  Crying every day before work kind of hating it.

My dad took pity on me and gave me a job in his law office as a rounds clerk.  I'm not sure if they even have rounds clerks anymore but back then my job was walking around town every day filing documents in court, delivering briefs, picking things up, dropping things off, and conducting property settlements.

For whatever reason, I really enjoyed doing property settlements.  Back then (again, this has probably all changed) all the conveyancers in South Australia would meet at the Lands Titles Office every morning.  The banks had desks around the perimeter of the room, which was always packed with people and LOUD.  You walked around yelling at the top of your lungs for the conveyancer you were meeting, then you lined up to see the banks deal with the mortgages, and that's how property changed hands.

Now bear with me.  Things get a bit complicated here.  I did say this was a convoluted story.

I did my conveyancing diploma part-time at night, and I got a job at a small private mortgage company, which was then sold to a bigger private mortgage company, who transferred my role to their external conveyancer... who wasn't much fun to work for.

The view from my old house in southern Adelaide.  The black clouds are a good reflection of how I felt about that house.

After the private mortgage company was sold, and I got transferred to the external conveyancer, and he wasn't much fun to work for, I went job hunting again (always, always, looking for a change) and got a job at a company which did a lot of work for oil and gas clients.

I think this is Moana beach in Adelaide.  It's a beach south of Adelaide that you can drive onto, at any rate

Around the same time, I met my then-boyfriend's brother's girlfriend's sister (still with me?) who worked for a client of my new employer.  The boyfriend's-brother's-girlfriend's-sister had been transferred to a job in a little town called Roma in Queensland.  She recommended me for her old job in Adelaide, which I got.

I loved it, loved my job for the first time probably ever.  Part of the job was giving safety presentations.  I think the goal was 50 presentations.  In my first year I gave over one hundred presentations, all over the state.  Turns out, I love public speaking!

Me, describing in lavish detail how gas pipelines can explode and destroy everything in the vicinity.

Heading north on another pipeline safety trip, looking towards the Flinders Ranges I think

I was earning good money, feeling motivated and positive.  I quit smoking.  I got really dissatisfied with my personal life which in comparison seemed like the same old depressing hamster wheel.

Anyway, after not long at all, my boyfriend's-brother's-girlfriend's-sister was leaving her job in Queensland.  Once again, the role she was vacating was suggested as the logical next step for me.  Once again, I got the job.  Yes, in Queensland.

It never once occurred to me not to leap at the chance.  Of course I would move to Queensland if the opportunity arose.  Why on earth would I say no??  Always, always, looking for something.

I was to move to Queensland around Easter that year, with the intention that my boyfriend would be in Roma within a couple of months.

I left Adelaide mid-morning and arrived at the house in Roma late at night.  It was a big new-ish house, almost empty.  I walked in the front door, set my bag on the kitchen bench, and let out a huge sigh.

I love that I have a photo of that very moment.

I remember it so clearly.

It felt like the first time I'd exhaled in years.  At that moment I knew my relationship was over.  I was so unhappy.  It wasn't fixable.  It took getting away to realise it.

The drive to work in Queensland.  After that I never want to commute through city traffic again.

Then, very shortly after, I met B at a community boxing match.  He got my phone number from a mutual friend, we went on a date to the second-best Chinese restaurant in town, and I remember looking at him as he paid the bill.  I'm not a believer in love at first sight but I knew that this was going to be something.  This was the start of something good.

Sunset from my house in Roma, Queensland.

Of course you don't just sail off into the sunset.  Ending my previous relationship was hard and messy and painful, and severing things financially took months.  But there was no question about what the right thing for me was.

I had never wanted children.  Never wanted to get married.  In fact Past Prue would probably look at my life now and feel a bit disappointed with how ordinary it's turned out, what with the baking and gardening and stay-at-home-parenting.  But what Past Prue would not be able to fathom is how deeply contented and happy she would be - at last - in this very ordinary life.

I rattled around a lot for the first 30 years of my life.  Looking back it's easy to see that I was never very happy.  Always, always, moving job or house or friends, always looking for something.

Always dreaming of a different life without knowing what it was.

I found it!

A pre-Christmas vignette

It's a Christmastime vignette!  My star garland, Santa snowglobe, the ever-present sweet peas and a colander full of fresh greens waiting to be dealt with (also ever-present at this time of year).

First things first, we did it.  A's bed is now in J's room.  Lots of people had positive stories for me about what a game-changer it was for the sleep issues in their house.  So far, for us, it hasn't changed a lot.  She still refuses to sleep in there at night.  Poor J was so excited to share a room, she was so downcast when A refused.  I felt awful.  The good news is, I can now tell J that I or her dad will be sleeping in there if she wants us to.  It's much easier overall.

The other A-related news is that she is all of a sudden refusing to nap.  Like when J dropped her naps, it just suddenly happened one day.  And now she often won't have a nap unless she falls asleep in the car. 

I dreaded this day - the day naps were a thing of the past - but in actual fact it's great.  We've reached the point where naps are kind of a pain.  It's great now, not having to be home for naptime!  The day is ours.  Sure, it's a bit inconvenient when I've got invoices to prepare or pay, or phone calls to make, but mostly it's way better.  Another step into that next stage of life I was talking about.



In the category of making and baking, I've been doggedly doing rows of bloody Sauvie.  I finished the cardigan and skirt set for J's doll.

I've been wilting, chopping and freezing spinach.  I made Foxs Lane's cheesy garden bread the other day, I've picked bowlfuls of peas and strawberries (and J can eat them faster than I can pick them), I've made peach cobbler and shortbread.  There is a constant supply of fresh lettuce in the fridge and I'm checking the tomatoes and squashes daily.  Did I tell you I forgot to thin the squash plants and so we have twelve of them?  Get your squash here!

The weather has been totally whacko.  We had an awesome thunderstorm the other day with lots of fantastic rumbling thunder and black clouds.  It's also been hot and dry in between times so the downpour from the storm was very welcome.

If you squint you can just see the mountain through the rain

My dad came for a visit a couple of weeks ago.  It's a great time of year for visitors with all the Christmas stuff we were able to do - decorating our tree, watching the local Christmas Parade, the kindy's end-of-year disco...  The week flew by!  Poor Dad caught a cold which put a dampener on the end of the trip but otherwise everyone had a ball.

Ok, ready for your vegetable garden update? 

Here's a reminder of what it looked like four weeks ago:


And this is yesterday:


Everything just grows like crazy here right now.  I have to pick produce every single day to keep on top of it, and it's still not at its peak.  Needless to say I'm LOVING IT.

I may not post again before Christmas so I hope everyone has a nice safe, relaxing, peaceful, non-stressful time.  We'll be with B's various family members and then it's off to the bach for a few days.  Cannot wait!

See you in 2019, if not before.

Things that are good

Here is a list, in the order they occurred to me, of things at the moment that are making me happy...



The other day, as I was knitting in front of the tv, realising that I was knitting mostly by feel without having to watch my hands the whole time.

The smell of sweet peas on my dining table.

Swapping out the flannelette sheets on the bed for plain cotton ones at last.



Little girls making each other giggle helplessly, without it ending in tears.

Rocket that grows so fast I can cut some for my lunch every day.  I can't believe how much I was paying for bags of the stuff at the supermarket.

Christmas being just around the corner.

Time spent together as a family.  It doesn't matter what we're doing, my favourite thing is to be all four of us together.



Realising the progress I've made on the ukulele when songs I found challenging a couple of weeks ago are now easy and effortless to play.

When the mowing is done, the weeding is done, the laundry up to date, the house tidy (if not clean...).  That happy, weary... slightly sweaty... and virtuous feeling when all jobs are done.

Kindy mums who let me know that, on her first day at kindy last week, A stopped crying a minute after I left.  And kindy mums who convince me to forget my to-do list on that day and to go have a coffee instead.  Which I did.  And read two whole magazines.  Heaven.




When I've waited all day to sit down with my knitting, that feeling when I do finally sit down with my knitting.


And now, just quietly, some things that are less good...

The loaf of sourdough I made the other day which was as flat as a pancake, and which I finished off by burning it in the oven.  Why?  All that effort down the drain.  Or into the pig bucket, as the case may be.

Following a new recipe to the letter and having it fail.  Again I ask, WHY?

Winds that bruise and damage plants.

My girls both having a cry every single day that they miss their dad and want him to come home from work.  Shutdowns bring home the bacon but they are not conducive to family life.

Now let's not end this on a negative note, because not only am I sitting here with all jobs done, slightly sweaty, I'm also about to pick up my knitting!

Happy Sunday, friends xx

Things in November

I just went for a quick walk around the place to take the photos for today's post.  It rained basically all day yesterday and everything is soft and dripping.  It's so intensely green.  I wonder if I will ever get used to how green it is?  You can almost smell the photosynthesis.



It's been excellent staying-inside weather, and I've made a concerted effort to finish those knitting and crochet WIPs in my basket.  I FINALLY finished A's baby blanket (only *cough* two and half years later), and I've cast on the back piece of the dreaded Sauvie vest.  It should be ready for next winter.



I'm also working on some clothes for the girls' dolls in the hope that they might stop raiding their own drawers for doll clothes.  Anyone else's kids do this?  It drives me berserk!!

Speaking of those little girls, it's been a real joy and a BIG relief for me to see them start to get along and play cooperatively at last.  Basically since A has been able to express herself she and J have fought.  I mean they really go to town.  It never occurred to me in having two kids close together that they would fight so much.  Recently they seem to have found a groove together though.



Maybe because A can participate in imaginative play a bit better now, or maybe because J is a bit older and more understanding, or probably a combination of a million factors, but it's been a delight and, like I said, a huge relief.  They might not end up on the Jeremy Kyle show after all!



Other than playing nicely with her sister, J is suddenly consumed with writing.  She doesn't really draw and has never shown much interest in writing, other than her adorable pretend writing which looks like the scratchings of a serial killer.  When I've offered to teach her how to write her name she couldn't be less interested.  If it's not important to her, it's not important to me.

Until now!  It's fascinating to watch, to see it click in her mind, and her excitement that all those shapes can be arranged to mean something.  The first recognisable thing she wrote was B's name and I think I almost saw a tear in his eye when she showed him.

With all this sun and rain the vegetable garden is going off its head.  Remember what it looked like a month ago?  Here let me remind you:

And here it is today:


I cannot keep on top of the weeds.  I weeded it a week ago.  I give up.  I'm now just trying to keep the beds weed-free and let the paths take care of themselves.  I do hate how messy it looks but there just is not the time, especially as I also have to mow the grass at least once a week or else it's like trying to cut hay.



One reason I've been trying to get through my craft WIPs is because at this time of year they take up too much time.  There's grass to mow, garden beds to weed, plants to plant, water, harvest, stake, and prune.  My knitting naturally falls down the list as the days warm up.



Plus, it's much harder to sit on the deck supervising the girls' water play with knitting on my lap than with my ukulele in hand practising my latest song.  I have a folder full of tunes to learn and am still really enjoying myself.  Can't say I will be dragging it out at parties or anything just yet (singing in public, no thank you) but it's fun for me and the girls have even started making requests which is very gratifying.  Although admittedly sometimes I get a couple of bars in and A starts yelling "Mummy no!  Mummy 'top.  'TOP IT, MUM".

I hate to do this to you, but just think - a month from today it will be CHRISTMAS!!

The next stage

We sold A's cot last week.

We sold it mainly because she is - yep - still sleeping in our bed (judge away!), but also because if she ever returns to her own bed, she doesn't need a cot anymore.  She'll be sleeping in a big girl bed.

So that's that.  There is no cot in our house anymore and I don't expect there ever will be again.  I remember writing not that long ago of all the parenting milestones I couldn't wait to pass.  This was definitely one of them.

On that note, I took the pram out of my car a couple of months ago to fit something else in and I never got around to putting it back.  It hasn't mattered.  We don't need the pram anymore either.  That was another milestone that seemed so far in the future.



We recently went for an overnight stay to B's dad's bach (holiday house) up the coast.  It was great.  The kids ran around on the beach picking up shells and splashing in the shallows.  Back at the house they played with their toys and read their books.  They ate fish and chips and sandwiches and fruit.  It was easy and fun.  Last time we stayed overnight at the bach was six months ago and it was hell.  A grizzled constantly, she wouldn't put her feet on the sand or the grass or in the water, she wanted to be carried the whole time, and I couldn't wait to get home.  That's behind us now too.

There might be a place for A at kindy in a few weeks.  Oh how I have dreamed of that day.  And, of course, now that it's imminent, I feel suddenly unsure and unready.  I know she'll be fine and she'll love it, but it's such a change.  She's almost never spent time in anyone's care except mine.



When we lived in Perth and B worked FIFO (fly in, fly out) I had dear Nanny P who took J a couple of times a week from when J was only about five months old, so the jump to daycare and then kindy never felt so momentous.  Not to mention that by the time J started daycare in Perth I already had five-month-old A, so it's not like I dropped J off and then had the day to myself anyway.

Then - due to the move to NZ combined with other factors - we never arranged daycare or a babysitter for A, so kindy will be her and my first real separation.  It's weird.  It's going to be great, obviously.  But I'm still a tangle of emotions at the thought of it.



It's just...   I didn't get a lot of joy from parenting poor A for a long time.  She was so miserable.  Everything was a struggle, for her and therefore for me - food, sleep, her mobility issues.  In the end none of it was very serious for which I'm so thankful but that doesn't make it any less hard when you're in the midst of it and it feels endless.  Now we're out the other side without me even noticing and into the next stage, which I have to tell you, seems to be a whole heap of fun.



The other way I know how much things have changed is that I've been reading- make that devouring - books again.  I don't think I've read a book since before A was born.  I'm back!!



Speaking of which, in my apparently never-ending quest for new hobbies, I've started learning to play the ukelele.  Pretty random, I know.  But I'd heard it was quite easy to learn, and of course it's such a fun and portable instrument.  I can already play piano and read music so I thought I might be ahead of the game but I can now confirm that the piano has nothing in common with a stringed instrument.  Oh my poor fingers.

I'm having a lot of fun though and, as is my way, have commenced a 30-day Learn the Ukulele challenge.  Look, I'm not actually expecting to become proficient in thirty days.  But each day's lesson is a management bite-sized chunk of skills so that even after a week I can see major improvement.  Some lessons I skip through quickly and some I take several days to master.

The teacher I'm using is on YouTube and she does great tutorials and her lessons are free, yes: free: Bernadette Teaches Music.

Check out this ham!  As I said to a friend, it's the Matterhorn of hams.

B's dad raises pigs which means we get an endless supply of pork.  It's probably the best pork you'll ever eat but it's still... pork.  Meh.  Until we had the brilliant idea to have our last beast turned into mince, ham, and bacon!  I know.  Genius.  The butcher cured the ham for us and then it was up to me to bake it.  It turned out ok, not amazing, but luckily I have many more opportunities to perfect the art.

The vegetable garden is in full swing of prep and planting.  We're trying to be way more organised and methodical this year.  I even drew a diagram of the garden so we could map out where to plant everything.  I know.  So professional.  So far we have kale (for the chooks), lettuces, zucchini, squash, rocket, tomatoes, corn, various onions, spinach, various beans and peas.  Oh and strawberries.  And the ubiquitous rhubarb and herbs.  I'm feeling optimistic for bumper crops.

I haven't baked a loaf of sourdough for a few weeks but I can turn out a decent loaf fairly reliably.  They're still a bit flat and dense but they do have that lovely sourdough taste and chew.  After an unenthusiastic start even J is now a huge fan.  A, not so much.  Shocking, I know.

My 12-week fitness challenge ends this week.  Safe to say I fell off the wagon somewhat with the exercise, but my eating habits have changed significantly for the better.  I'm a few kilos down and have shed some major centimetres.  I didn't take measurements but my clothes tell me everything I need to know. 

Although I didn't exactly finish strong, the challenge gave me the motivation and support I needed to make some positive changes.  I still highly recommend it, although be warned the recipes are CRAP.  The program I did was The Bod.  I participated in a "Restart", which basically means that everyone everywhere starts the program at the same time, but you can buy it and start it anytime you like.  I'll definitely be referring back to the exercise program if I feel like I need another boot up the bum.

I'm trying to think what else I need to catch up on...

I made a flying visit home to Adelaide a few weeks ago.  I was only there for three days but got my fill of family time and ate and drank myself stupid.  Cried my eyes out flying out over the Adelaide Hills.  This visit was incredibly brief but even if I was there a month it would never be long enough.  I adore NZ but it is bloody hard sometimes being away from my family.

Spring is here although we're having a bit of a cold snap at the moment.  I'm really trying not to light the fire but the past few mornings have been cold so it's still in use occasionally.  You can tell I took this photo below a while ago because that tree is now covered in new leaves, and so the cycle starts again.  

I love the seasons here. 

Can you believe two years ago we were still living in Perth without even a moving date set??  It feels like we've been here forever already.

This and that and everything else

I'd better write this before I put it off again and it all becomes irrelevant.

So, what's been going on around here?

One of our cows had a calf.  One of our sheep had twin lambs (yes, another set of twins).  My daphne is flowering and smells glorious.

After I foolishly wrote a post about A's sleep, it all went seriously haywire and now she sleeps in our bed.  Every nap.  And every night.  I kind of care, in that I'd prefer to have the bed to myself and B, but mostly I don't care.  It won't be forever.  I hope.

We're considering putting her and J in a room together as I've heard that sharing a room can quite often resolve whatever abandonment issues are keeping them from sleeping alone.  Anyone done this?  Tell me your tales!

Look at those big fatties! The sheep I'm talking about.  Those are the original twin lambs, Emily and Jack.  They're so big and cute and fat.  And pushy.

My health and fitness regime is going well.  I'm now into Week 5 of the program and it's nice to not be DYING halfway through the warm up anymore. 

I'm also eating nutritious food at least 80% of the time.  This is no thanks to the recipes provided with the program, which I've finally come to the conclusion are useless.  At first I thought it was just me cooking with unfamiliar ingredients (coconut oil, oat flour, etc), but seeing the feedback from everyone else doing the program we're all having the same trouble.  The recipes are rubbish, which is a bit disappointing.  I'm back to cooking my own creations and just keeping track of the nutrients.

Honestly, so far I don't feel much different - no more energy or better sleep or anything like that - but I do feel good about making good choices.  I enjoy my treats now without fretting about what I should or shouldn't have eaten.  If I have a really indulgent meal or even whole day (weekends are my downfall every time), I just start again the next day with the good choices.  That's a huge change of mindset for me, whereas previously I would have used a blowout as an excuse to give up: "I've failed now anyway..."

I finally made a decent loaf of sourdough!  Now this is exciting.  After those first few attempts, I just kind of gave up and put the starter in the fridge.  The loaves weren't turning out very nice, the kids wouldn't eat it, so I didn't feed my starter or even touch it for weeks. 

Then last week B urged me to have another go, selling me on the idea we could have it for breakfast on the weekend.  I got the starter out first thing Friday morning, poured some off and fed it.  To begin with it was very thin and lifeless but sure enough by Friday evening it was active and fragrant and ready.

I baked the loaf on Saturday and it was as good as any you would buy, if I do say so myself.  Sour, chewy, so good!  Even J rolled about three slices for her lunch.  So apparently neglect is the key to good sourdough.  Who knew?

In craft news, which I know fascinates everyone no end, I'm doggedly working my way through the last of my works-in-progress - that bloody Sauvie vest, and A's baby blanket which considering she's turning two this month is AHEM somewhat overdue.  After that, J has made several very specific requests for garments for her dolls and she likes to check back in with me about them several times a week so I'd better get cracking.

And that brings us pretty well up-to-date.

Don't forget to tell me your experiences of kids sharing bedrooms!  Or, for that matter, any other zero-effort zero-crying ways to get an extremely stubborn kid out of your bed...