Baking bread

Back when I only cooked from packets and jars and didn't know my shallots from my spring onions, I never realised that making bread was anything special.

My sister, who cooks all kinds of incredible things, mentioned once in passing that she could never get her bread to turn out right. It gave me pause because I knew she made some extraordinary dishes. But not bread? Something so simple, such a pantry staple, how could it be difficult? 

Once I did learn to cook and to make things from scratch, I also learned that the fewer the ingredients, the more important the method. Bechamel sauce, chocolate mousse, jam. Bread. 

I can make a creamy bechamel with my eyes closed, and after years of experimenting, I can somewhat reliably turn out a decent crusty bread. 

I still cannot master my mum's chocolate mousse recipe, however. It has like, three ingredients. Mum can't understand why none of us can get it right, and we can't find that magic touch to alchemise those three disparate ingredients into the lightest airiest chocolaty-est confection.

But, back to the bread.

It must be about ten years, on and off, that I've been baking bread. Mostly being disappointed with the results, and overwhelmed with the science and the variables when trying to understand why my loaves were flat, or dense, or airless.

I've tried so many bread recipes, all promising a beautiful loaf. I've dabbled in sourdough. I've tried dozens of bread mixes. I've used a breadmaker, a loaf pan, and now, my favourite method, a dutch oven.

Like many people, covid gave me a reason to address bread baking again. For some reason, during the first lockdown in March 2020, I turned out beautiful puffy loaves one after the other. Finally! I had it! Then we came out of lockdown, and with the same recipe I was now getting flat hard frisbees. Some so sloppy I tipped them in the bin rather than waste time baking something so obviously wrong. 

I still carried on baking, found another recipe, and baked it again and again. I've made this bread over a hundred times I'm sure.

As so often happens with these things, I didn't consciously realise what was happening until I recently mentioned to a friend in passing about "when I bake bread" and she said, gosh do you make bread?? And I realised that I do. And I don't even really think about it anymore. I know my recipe off by heart.

And now I've realised that the trick is to choose a recipe that's not too arduous for you, and make it over and over so that you know know it back to front. You can look at your dough and you instantly know what it needs. 

It gives me inordinate joy that my kids, the fussiest eaters on the planet, who love packet food above all else, adore my homemade bread. "Crusty bread! Crusty bread!" they squeal excitedly to each other.

Here is the bread recipe I use: 

https://www.lifeasastrawberry.com/easy-crusty-french-bread/

One thing I love about this method is how much additional detail and information is provided. This, I am sure, helped me hugely to perfect my loaves.

Now if I could just conquer that chocolate mousse.

Back to normal

After having a very relaxing time over Christmas and New Year, I woke up last week with a steely glint in my eye and a fire in my belly.  I washed and vacuumed and mowed.  I packed away the Christmas decorations.  I ruthlessly culled my wardrobe of clothes I no longer wear or which no longer fit (thanks The Bod!).  I weeded all the garden beds.  It felt great to be so productive and to get the place in shape after taking a holiday from (most) responsibilities for a couple of weeks.



Christmas feels like months ago already.  We spent the morning at my sister-in-law's place for an amazing brunch, then to B's dad's in the afternoon for a swim and a barbeque.  We brought the girls home for their bedtime and then B went back for a few beers with his brother who was over from Australia.

Between Christmas and New Year we went up to the bach a couple of times.  It's only an hour's drive away which makes it easy to come and go.  B's mum babysat the girls so we could go to the bach for New Year's Eve unfettered.  We even made it to 2am!  I can't remember the last time I stayed up that late, ever.  We were up early on new year's day to get back home and it's safe to say I wasn't feeling my best.  The first day of the year was a struggle to say the least, especially with two little girls who weren't going to let us out of their sight in case we snuck out on them again.



Speaking of New Year's, I can't decide if I'm a resolutions person or not.  Generally if I want to change something I wouldn't wait for the new year to do it.  That said, the good habits I picked up doing The Bod program have slipped a bit.  I'm drinking way too much coke, I'm eating a lot of pasta and fast food.  I'm still eating a good amount of vegetables, because at the moment the fastest food is that right outside my door.  However, the diet could use some improvement.  Some days, the only fluids I have are coffee, coke, and wine.  I know.



So!

We are tentatively planning to include Meat-Free Monday (or, any day) every week, and I'm aiming to drain my 750ml water bottle at least once a day.  My mum told that if you drink the majority of your water before lunch you won't be up all night going to the loo, so my aim is A Litre by Lunch.  Catchy!

Another resolution, if you want to call it that, is to attack my to-do list.  One thing that bullet journalling taught me last year is that I am quite happy to just keep writing the same tasks on my list every week without ever ticking them off.  But then I feel constantly irritated and can't relax looking at all the things that need doing.  So.  Just do the things.  Tick them off.  Move on.

The thing that will make the ticking off of the list easier is that, as I've mentioned about eleventy billion times already, A starts kindy this year.  Regular solid blocks of time, kid-free.  Obviously there'll be a touch of Real Housewives watching, but I'm really looking forward to some major time to get jobs done.

It's been seriously dry here for the last few weeks, not too hot thank goodness, but hardly any rain.  The paddocks are looks as dry as I've ever seen them.  The grass has almost stopped growing!  Well, not quite.  The lawns still need mowing twice a week.  Bring on winter I say.

We're still trying to address A's, and to a lesser extent, J's fussy eating.  Since B has been off work during December we've been having the occasional family dinner and I know I've said it before, but it really makes a difference to how the girls eat.  The other night we had burgers which I was fully expecting to be rejected, only for them both to dig in with enthusiasm.  Who knew!  It shows me how much I worry about their eating when they do eat without fuss and I feel so happy and relieved.  It's so good to make progress, however small.

As you may recall, A turned two in September and oh boy do we know about it.  J never really threw tantrums.  We never really had the terrible twos or the threenager with her.  Luckily, A is making up for everything that J spared us.  The fury inside that pudgy little body has to be seen to be believed.  The will of steel.  I'm a pretty stubborn person with a pretty strong will of my own and I am no match for this kid.  B and I have both been heard to say "Just give her what she wants!" to make the screaming stop.  Another one of those things I never thought I would do as a parent.  But hey.  You do what you gotta do.

One thing I want to note here is that it's now over a year since J commenced toilet training.  It's only now that she has returned to wearing undies fulltime.  It's taken a full year.  I don't know why.  We waited until she was ready.  She led the process, with our support.  I never made a big deal about anything, that I can think of.  And yet time and again she has insisted on wearing nappies, for months at a time.  She'd stay dry in her nappy all day, pulling it down to use the toilet, and yet would refuse to wear undies.  One of the very few times when we've seen her exert her will.

She turns four in February.  She's in undies now but I won't be at all surprised if we go back to nappies again.  I've tried to ask her why she prefers nappies but of course she can't articulate whatever it is.  She's nowhere near being dry at night.  I dunno.  Just one of those things I guess.

Well I'd better go tackle the lawns again before it (hopefully...) rains!  Hope you have all had a lovely Christmas and New Year and feeling positive for the year ahead.

A pre-Christmas vignette

It's a Christmastime vignette!  My star garland, Santa snowglobe, the ever-present sweet peas and a colander full of fresh greens waiting to be dealt with (also ever-present at this time of year).

First things first, we did it.  A's bed is now in J's room.  Lots of people had positive stories for me about what a game-changer it was for the sleep issues in their house.  So far, for us, it hasn't changed a lot.  She still refuses to sleep in there at night.  Poor J was so excited to share a room, she was so downcast when A refused.  I felt awful.  The good news is, I can now tell J that I or her dad will be sleeping in there if she wants us to.  It's much easier overall.

The other A-related news is that she is all of a sudden refusing to nap.  Like when J dropped her naps, it just suddenly happened one day.  And now she often won't have a nap unless she falls asleep in the car. 

I dreaded this day - the day naps were a thing of the past - but in actual fact it's great.  We've reached the point where naps are kind of a pain.  It's great now, not having to be home for naptime!  The day is ours.  Sure, it's a bit inconvenient when I've got invoices to prepare or pay, or phone calls to make, but mostly it's way better.  Another step into that next stage of life I was talking about.



In the category of making and baking, I've been doggedly doing rows of bloody Sauvie.  I finished the cardigan and skirt set for J's doll.

I've been wilting, chopping and freezing spinach.  I made Foxs Lane's cheesy garden bread the other day, I've picked bowlfuls of peas and strawberries (and J can eat them faster than I can pick them), I've made peach cobbler and shortbread.  There is a constant supply of fresh lettuce in the fridge and I'm checking the tomatoes and squashes daily.  Did I tell you I forgot to thin the squash plants and so we have twelve of them?  Get your squash here!

The weather has been totally whacko.  We had an awesome thunderstorm the other day with lots of fantastic rumbling thunder and black clouds.  It's also been hot and dry in between times so the downpour from the storm was very welcome.

If you squint you can just see the mountain through the rain

My dad came for a visit a couple of weeks ago.  It's a great time of year for visitors with all the Christmas stuff we were able to do - decorating our tree, watching the local Christmas Parade, the kindy's end-of-year disco...  The week flew by!  Poor Dad caught a cold which put a dampener on the end of the trip but otherwise everyone had a ball.

Ok, ready for your vegetable garden update? 

Here's a reminder of what it looked like four weeks ago:


And this is yesterday:


Everything just grows like crazy here right now.  I have to pick produce every single day to keep on top of it, and it's still not at its peak.  Needless to say I'm LOVING IT.

I may not post again before Christmas so I hope everyone has a nice safe, relaxing, peaceful, non-stressful time.  We'll be with B's various family members and then it's off to the bach for a few days.  Cannot wait!

See you in 2019, if not before.

Things in November

I just went for a quick walk around the place to take the photos for today's post.  It rained basically all day yesterday and everything is soft and dripping.  It's so intensely green.  I wonder if I will ever get used to how green it is?  You can almost smell the photosynthesis.



It's been excellent staying-inside weather, and I've made a concerted effort to finish those knitting and crochet WIPs in my basket.  I FINALLY finished A's baby blanket (only *cough* two and half years later), and I've cast on the back piece of the dreaded Sauvie vest.  It should be ready for next winter.



I'm also working on some clothes for the girls' dolls in the hope that they might stop raiding their own drawers for doll clothes.  Anyone else's kids do this?  It drives me berserk!!

Speaking of those little girls, it's been a real joy and a BIG relief for me to see them start to get along and play cooperatively at last.  Basically since A has been able to express herself she and J have fought.  I mean they really go to town.  It never occurred to me in having two kids close together that they would fight so much.  Recently they seem to have found a groove together though.



Maybe because A can participate in imaginative play a bit better now, or maybe because J is a bit older and more understanding, or probably a combination of a million factors, but it's been a delight and, like I said, a huge relief.  They might not end up on the Jeremy Kyle show after all!



Other than playing nicely with her sister, J is suddenly consumed with writing.  She doesn't really draw and has never shown much interest in writing, other than her adorable pretend writing which looks like the scratchings of a serial killer.  When I've offered to teach her how to write her name she couldn't be less interested.  If it's not important to her, it's not important to me.

Until now!  It's fascinating to watch, to see it click in her mind, and her excitement that all those shapes can be arranged to mean something.  The first recognisable thing she wrote was B's name and I think I almost saw a tear in his eye when she showed him.

With all this sun and rain the vegetable garden is going off its head.  Remember what it looked like a month ago?  Here let me remind you:

And here it is today:


I cannot keep on top of the weeds.  I weeded it a week ago.  I give up.  I'm now just trying to keep the beds weed-free and let the paths take care of themselves.  I do hate how messy it looks but there just is not the time, especially as I also have to mow the grass at least once a week or else it's like trying to cut hay.



One reason I've been trying to get through my craft WIPs is because at this time of year they take up too much time.  There's grass to mow, garden beds to weed, plants to plant, water, harvest, stake, and prune.  My knitting naturally falls down the list as the days warm up.



Plus, it's much harder to sit on the deck supervising the girls' water play with knitting on my lap than with my ukulele in hand practising my latest song.  I have a folder full of tunes to learn and am still really enjoying myself.  Can't say I will be dragging it out at parties or anything just yet (singing in public, no thank you) but it's fun for me and the girls have even started making requests which is very gratifying.  Although admittedly sometimes I get a couple of bars in and A starts yelling "Mummy no!  Mummy 'top.  'TOP IT, MUM".

I hate to do this to you, but just think - a month from today it will be CHRISTMAS!!

The next stage

We sold A's cot last week.

We sold it mainly because she is - yep - still sleeping in our bed (judge away!), but also because if she ever returns to her own bed, she doesn't need a cot anymore.  She'll be sleeping in a big girl bed.

So that's that.  There is no cot in our house anymore and I don't expect there ever will be again.  I remember writing not that long ago of all the parenting milestones I couldn't wait to pass.  This was definitely one of them.

On that note, I took the pram out of my car a couple of months ago to fit something else in and I never got around to putting it back.  It hasn't mattered.  We don't need the pram anymore either.  That was another milestone that seemed so far in the future.



We recently went for an overnight stay to B's dad's bach (holiday house) up the coast.  It was great.  The kids ran around on the beach picking up shells and splashing in the shallows.  Back at the house they played with their toys and read their books.  They ate fish and chips and sandwiches and fruit.  It was easy and fun.  Last time we stayed overnight at the bach was six months ago and it was hell.  A grizzled constantly, she wouldn't put her feet on the sand or the grass or in the water, she wanted to be carried the whole time, and I couldn't wait to get home.  That's behind us now too.

There might be a place for A at kindy in a few weeks.  Oh how I have dreamed of that day.  And, of course, now that it's imminent, I feel suddenly unsure and unready.  I know she'll be fine and she'll love it, but it's such a change.  She's almost never spent time in anyone's care except mine.



When we lived in Perth and B worked FIFO (fly in, fly out) I had dear Nanny P who took J a couple of times a week from when J was only about five months old, so the jump to daycare and then kindy never felt so momentous.  Not to mention that by the time J started daycare in Perth I already had five-month-old A, so it's not like I dropped J off and then had the day to myself anyway.

Then - due to the move to NZ combined with other factors - we never arranged daycare or a babysitter for A, so kindy will be her and my first real separation.  It's weird.  It's going to be great, obviously.  But I'm still a tangle of emotions at the thought of it.



It's just...   I didn't get a lot of joy from parenting poor A for a long time.  She was so miserable.  Everything was a struggle, for her and therefore for me - food, sleep, her mobility issues.  In the end none of it was very serious for which I'm so thankful but that doesn't make it any less hard when you're in the midst of it and it feels endless.  Now we're out the other side without me even noticing and into the next stage, which I have to tell you, seems to be a whole heap of fun.



The other way I know how much things have changed is that I've been reading- make that devouring - books again.  I don't think I've read a book since before A was born.  I'm back!!



Speaking of which, in my apparently never-ending quest for new hobbies, I've started learning to play the ukelele.  Pretty random, I know.  But I'd heard it was quite easy to learn, and of course it's such a fun and portable instrument.  I can already play piano and read music so I thought I might be ahead of the game but I can now confirm that the piano has nothing in common with a stringed instrument.  Oh my poor fingers.

I'm having a lot of fun though and, as is my way, have commenced a 30-day Learn the Ukulele challenge.  Look, I'm not actually expecting to become proficient in thirty days.  But each day's lesson is a management bite-sized chunk of skills so that even after a week I can see major improvement.  Some lessons I skip through quickly and some I take several days to master.

The teacher I'm using is on YouTube and she does great tutorials and her lessons are free, yes: free: Bernadette Teaches Music.

Check out this ham!  As I said to a friend, it's the Matterhorn of hams.

B's dad raises pigs which means we get an endless supply of pork.  It's probably the best pork you'll ever eat but it's still... pork.  Meh.  Until we had the brilliant idea to have our last beast turned into mince, ham, and bacon!  I know.  Genius.  The butcher cured the ham for us and then it was up to me to bake it.  It turned out ok, not amazing, but luckily I have many more opportunities to perfect the art.

The vegetable garden is in full swing of prep and planting.  We're trying to be way more organised and methodical this year.  I even drew a diagram of the garden so we could map out where to plant everything.  I know.  So professional.  So far we have kale (for the chooks), lettuces, zucchini, squash, rocket, tomatoes, corn, various onions, spinach, various beans and peas.  Oh and strawberries.  And the ubiquitous rhubarb and herbs.  I'm feeling optimistic for bumper crops.

I haven't baked a loaf of sourdough for a few weeks but I can turn out a decent loaf fairly reliably.  They're still a bit flat and dense but they do have that lovely sourdough taste and chew.  After an unenthusiastic start even J is now a huge fan.  A, not so much.  Shocking, I know.

My 12-week fitness challenge ends this week.  Safe to say I fell off the wagon somewhat with the exercise, but my eating habits have changed significantly for the better.  I'm a few kilos down and have shed some major centimetres.  I didn't take measurements but my clothes tell me everything I need to know. 

Although I didn't exactly finish strong, the challenge gave me the motivation and support I needed to make some positive changes.  I still highly recommend it, although be warned the recipes are CRAP.  The program I did was The Bod.  I participated in a "Restart", which basically means that everyone everywhere starts the program at the same time, but you can buy it and start it anytime you like.  I'll definitely be referring back to the exercise program if I feel like I need another boot up the bum.

I'm trying to think what else I need to catch up on...

I made a flying visit home to Adelaide a few weeks ago.  I was only there for three days but got my fill of family time and ate and drank myself stupid.  Cried my eyes out flying out over the Adelaide Hills.  This visit was incredibly brief but even if I was there a month it would never be long enough.  I adore NZ but it is bloody hard sometimes being away from my family.

Spring is here although we're having a bit of a cold snap at the moment.  I'm really trying not to light the fire but the past few mornings have been cold so it's still in use occasionally.  You can tell I took this photo below a while ago because that tree is now covered in new leaves, and so the cycle starts again.  

I love the seasons here. 

Can you believe two years ago we were still living in Perth without even a moving date set??  It feels like we've been here forever already.

This and that and everything else

I'd better write this before I put it off again and it all becomes irrelevant.

So, what's been going on around here?

One of our cows had a calf.  One of our sheep had twin lambs (yes, another set of twins).  My daphne is flowering and smells glorious.

After I foolishly wrote a post about A's sleep, it all went seriously haywire and now she sleeps in our bed.  Every nap.  And every night.  I kind of care, in that I'd prefer to have the bed to myself and B, but mostly I don't care.  It won't be forever.  I hope.

We're considering putting her and J in a room together as I've heard that sharing a room can quite often resolve whatever abandonment issues are keeping them from sleeping alone.  Anyone done this?  Tell me your tales!

Look at those big fatties! The sheep I'm talking about.  Those are the original twin lambs, Emily and Jack.  They're so big and cute and fat.  And pushy.

My health and fitness regime is going well.  I'm now into Week 5 of the program and it's nice to not be DYING halfway through the warm up anymore. 

I'm also eating nutritious food at least 80% of the time.  This is no thanks to the recipes provided with the program, which I've finally come to the conclusion are useless.  At first I thought it was just me cooking with unfamiliar ingredients (coconut oil, oat flour, etc), but seeing the feedback from everyone else doing the program we're all having the same trouble.  The recipes are rubbish, which is a bit disappointing.  I'm back to cooking my own creations and just keeping track of the nutrients.

Honestly, so far I don't feel much different - no more energy or better sleep or anything like that - but I do feel good about making good choices.  I enjoy my treats now without fretting about what I should or shouldn't have eaten.  If I have a really indulgent meal or even whole day (weekends are my downfall every time), I just start again the next day with the good choices.  That's a huge change of mindset for me, whereas previously I would have used a blowout as an excuse to give up: "I've failed now anyway..."

I finally made a decent loaf of sourdough!  Now this is exciting.  After those first few attempts, I just kind of gave up and put the starter in the fridge.  The loaves weren't turning out very nice, the kids wouldn't eat it, so I didn't feed my starter or even touch it for weeks. 

Then last week B urged me to have another go, selling me on the idea we could have it for breakfast on the weekend.  I got the starter out first thing Friday morning, poured some off and fed it.  To begin with it was very thin and lifeless but sure enough by Friday evening it was active and fragrant and ready.

I baked the loaf on Saturday and it was as good as any you would buy, if I do say so myself.  Sour, chewy, so good!  Even J rolled about three slices for her lunch.  So apparently neglect is the key to good sourdough.  Who knew?

In craft news, which I know fascinates everyone no end, I'm doggedly working my way through the last of my works-in-progress - that bloody Sauvie vest, and A's baby blanket which considering she's turning two this month is AHEM somewhat overdue.  After that, J has made several very specific requests for garments for her dolls and she likes to check back in with me about them several times a week so I'd better get cracking.

And that brings us pretty well up-to-date.

Don't forget to tell me your experiences of kids sharing bedrooms!  Or, for that matter, any other zero-effort zero-crying ways to get an extremely stubborn kid out of your bed...